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9月3日雅思写作范文:穷人的孩子早当家

9月3日雅思写作范文:穷人的孩子早当家

此作文版权美味英语与无忧雅思所有,转贴须注明来源!

Children who are brought up in families which have not great amount of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children are brought up by wealthy parents. Do you agree or disagree?

Among the factors that influence a child’s development, family financial background is a critical one. Empirically kids from rich families, after entering adulthood, deal with problems differently from those from less well-off households. Generally the latter is more capable of problem-solving.

Lack of wealth in a family usually helps children to become independent and responsible individuals. Rich kids have more toys. If a toy truck gets broken, parents would buy their children another fancier, more expensive one. Rich kids go the best school in the neighborhood. On the contrary, children from an ordinary family have to take good care of their toys. Their parents are often busy with work. So children have chances to make many of their own decisions. Many kids babysit younger brothers or sisters or even take small part-time jobs to help the family. Such differences in the upbringing often tough them for adult life.

Children from less affluent families learn about competition early in life. For example, they go to a good school only because they have excellent grades, not because daddy donates a building for the school. Hard work and constant trying are the only way to change their life. So they fight to be a winner. But rich kids are so over-protected by their families that they hardly know the harsh world until they leave college and start to work. There are more successful entrepreneurs, actors, doctors, and lawyers from poor families than from rich ones. Poor kids know how to survive in the big wild world better than their rich friends.

But there are cases in which children from rich families have grown up to be very smart, accomplished individuals. Many of them even start businesses independent from their families. But still most of them know more about having fun than about being a good working professional.

To sum up, less privileged family background generally enables children to be more responsible and independent. Poor kids value hard work more, handle competition better than rich kids, and cope with problems better after becoming adults.

(作者:无忧雅思网专栏作家:王军)

具体写作思路分析请看:

9月3日作文真题写作思路分析

[此贴子已经被作者于2005-9-4 11:44:59编辑过]

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最后两段完全可以写在一起呀

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请问楼主,这个题目可以理解为城市家庭与农村家庭的比较吗?

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ku

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xiexie

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看起来就很难阿[em01]

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[em01]

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找我们口语班的外教看了一下前几段,他这样改的Among(Of) the factors that influence a child’s development, family financial background is a critical one. Empirically kids(informal word,inappropriate in academic writing) from rich families, after entering adulthood, deal with problems differently(How?Could be more specific) from those from(repetitious) less well-off households. Generally the latter is(are,disagreement with kids/those) more capable of problem-solving(problem solving,the hyphen is redundant when it is used as a noun).

(The)Lack of wealth in a family usually(This word is rarely used in academic writing as it typically creates ambiguity and detracts from the reasoning.)helps(enables/prompts) children to become independent and responsible individuals. Rich kids have more toys. If a toy truck gets broken, parents would buy their children another(a)fancier, more expensive one. Rich kids go (to)the best school in the(their) neighborhood. On the contrary(In contrast), children from an ordinary family have to take good care of their toys(Why? Clarification needed.). (Connectives are missing here,which jumbles up the arguments in this paragraph)Their parents are often busy with work. So children have chances to make many of their own decisions(Logic error."All" their "own" decisions are made by themselves.) Many kids babysit younger brothers or sisters or even take small part-time jobs to help the family. Such differences in the upbringing often tough them(toughen them up)for adult life.

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提示: 作者被禁止或删除 内容自动屏蔽

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cc

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个人感觉,有时就是写不完那么多,象那么分四段的,就是总不够时间写完或者说可以写的完善的 。。。但格式真的很漂亮。。。

[em02]
.┣━┒ ; `.┣─┒` .. ; `. 。┟━┃┍╄┓┟━│ ╃━ ` ;. ` ┝─┃┣╈┤┣━┃;/ ╈ ╰ ┗━┘┗┸┛└━┛/┃┻ `. - ╭★` ﹏‐\ˋ☆.ˊ ︶丶If a thing is worth doing it is worth doing well!

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不是不可以,这可以理解成一种情况,如果通篇都讨论城市和农村的话,就把原题目的意思给写窄了

批改作文(20元/篇),代写PS,推荐信,简历,签证辅导,快速低价 010-86726823, joe@yummyenglish.com.cn 样本范例在 http://www.yummyenglish.com.cn/bbs/index.asp

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实际考试中肯定不会写这么多,因为是范文的原因就稍微长一点,但是段落4或5不是最关键,还是尽量把自己观点写清楚

批改作文(20元/篇),代写PS,推荐信,简历,签证辅导,快速低价 010-86726823, joe@yummyenglish.com.cn 样本范例在 http://www.yummyenglish.com.cn/bbs/index.asp

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Writing is the art of constant practice.

Sameul Johnson

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谢谢你们外教的意见,其中一些对提高写作很有帮助。

不过作为考试中限时写作这种情况来讲,关注的主要是写作整体质量。如果是写论文发表文章的话则要更加严谨,当然花费的时间和精力就更多。

批改作文(20元/篇),代写PS,推荐信,简历,签证辅导,快速低价 010-86726823, joe@yummyenglish.com.cn 样本范例在 http://www.yummyenglish.com.cn/bbs/index.asp

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hao

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jh

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[em08][em07]

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[em01]出来砸到 的确不容易 呵呵

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这个作文怎么这么难呢?好愁啊!!!!!

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